i’m sitting on the sofa, typing on my laptop, trying to think of something to write about to release some stress and frustration. i’ve stopped the sex and the city marathon that i was having so i can have silence to think. i need to unload my thoughts.
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i don’t know where to start…hmmmmm
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tick tock tick tock. i should be in bed by now.
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a note for someone:
do you have something to say to me? coz if you do, just tell me outright. i don’t understand why you have to message me and not say anything but my name. it’s annoying, to be honest.
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it’s funny. i still keep getting reminded of him, but the thought no longer brings feelings of hurt/longing/regret/etc. i don’t feel anything. not even anger or happiness or whatever. it seems like such a distant memory.
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i think that i’ve turned into a boring person. and it bothers me. i can barely talk about anything interesting anymore. i am so boring. so so boring. i bore even myself. i am going through a boring phase, one that i must escape before i bore him too much.
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i think i’m caught in 2 of my friends’ drama. and i hate it. i should call them up to talk, but i’m scared. and i don’t really want to think about it, but apparently, i’ve been unwillingly dragged into a couples’ fight. i hate this. i hate being in a situation that’s like this. i hate that i allowed this to happen. i feel guilty and i just wish people would stop telling me its alright, because it’s not. i don’t feel alright. i don’t feel comfortable. and i’m confused. i don’t know what to do. i don’t want to take sides. i don’t know. i don’t know.
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a note for someone else:
i’m sorry.
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i feel much better. it’s 2AM. im going to bed.
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